The Men Who Stare at Goats

Director: Grant Heslov

Starring: Kevin Spacey, Jeff Bridges, George Clooney, Ewan McGregor, Rebecca Mader, Stephen Root, Robert Patrick

Genre: Comedy, Indie, Off-Beat.

Year: 2009

Running Time: just a bit over an hour and a half

Plot synopsis: George Clooney and Jeff Bridges try to convince Ewan McGregor and themselves that they can create a new weapon for the armed forces…with their minds.

Review: Way off-beat, which means I loved it. Too indie to be accepted, and too quirky to be indie. This film followed its own path, and I thought it was hilarious and a joy to watch. Clooney is fantastic, and Jeff Bridges plays yet another character to perfection. And Spacey’s always good…can’t help that.

Watch for:

• Clooney’s face as he ‘cloudbursts.’ Classic.
• Jeff Bridges unintelligibly letting everyone know he’s going for ice cream.
• unfortunate special effects.
• the chance to see a T-1000, Charlotte from Lost, and Milton, all in the same film.

Film or Movie: Film.

Change the World Factor: No, but maybe a game-changer as far as movies and films go. Told its own story, and in the way it wanted to…regardless.

Buy It: Ya!

Rent It: only if you don’t take my advice and buy it. Buy it.

‘To die will be a great adventure.’
Karl.

(From The Dude, to Crazy Heart, to Obadiah Stane, Tron, and stuff-shirt psychologist in K-Pax…I think I’m the only person alive who actually liked that film…is there anything this guy can’t do? Well, besides pull off that shirt.)

Extract

Director: Mike Judge

Starring: Jason Bateman, J.K. Simmons, Mila Kunis, David Koechner, Kristen Wigg, Ben Affleck, and…uh…Gene Simmons.

Genre: Comedy, Satire, Mike Judge rocks.

Year: 2009

Running Time: just perfect.

Plot synopsis: Jason Bateman tries to save his marriage, business, and enjoyment of life in an unorthodox way. Ben Affleck helps.

Review: I have a soft spot for Mike Judge films. For those of you who don’t know, he’s the creative genius behind Office Space, Idiocracy, and the King of the Hill tv series. He has this way of satirizing things so that you’re able to watch them and go, ‘I know someone like that! I’ve just never been able to describe them that well.’ And this film is no different. It’s funny because life is funny. The characterizations are perfect. Incredible cast too, with the always classic Jason Bateman, and the makes-every-film-he’s-in-better J.K. Simmons. (With the possible exception of Spiderman.)

Watch for:

• David Koechner as ‘that neighbor.’ Brilliant.
• and Beth Grant, best known for her ‘I’ve got the cancer’ line in No Country for Old Men, as the bitter co-worker we all know.
• oh, and Ben Affleck taking step two (Hollywoodland was step one), towards showing us on screen that he is capable of taking himself less seriously, and asking us to reconsider remembering him as more than ‘Matt Damon’s friend.’

Film or Movie: Film. Yes, comedies can be films. It’s often times way more difficult to be funny than it is to be dramatic.

Change the World Factor: Eh, probably not.

Buy It: Ya…it could be worth a good few watches.

Rent It: For sure.

‘You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.’
Karl.

(Only part of the film I don’t get. Yes, that’s Gene Simmons, and yes, he’s in the film. And no, I do not think that’s his real hair.)

Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Director: Robert Rodriguez

Starring: Antonio Banderas, Salma Hayek, Cheech, Willem Dafoe, a pre-career-revived-because-of-The-Wrestler Mickey Rourke, Johnny Depp (?!), and for some reason, Enrique Iglesias.

Genre: Action, Spoofs That Aren’t Meant to be Spoofs

Year: 2003

Running Time: longer than you’d like it to be.

Plot synopsis: In a dustier and dirtier Mexico than probably has ever existed, Antonio Banderas, Enrique Iglesias, and that other guy, drive remote-controlled guitar case bombs into anything and everything until it explodes. And things explode very quickly in this movie.

Review: Here’s a movie you wish wasn’t made. While there may be a plot, it’s hidden under so much rubbish, that not even a cavalier performance from Johnny Depp can save this one. Featuring Willem Dafoe as an Hispanic, Mickey Rourke refusing to give up his dog for the shooting, and pistols that defy gravity……you have to watch this. It will make every other movie you ever watch, better. I have heard rumours that Robert Rodriguez purposefully makes his movies in an over-the-top, pulp fiction-ish manner. And that’s supposed to be an excuse for why they are so bad?

Watch for:

• Johnny Depp completely making fun of his role.
• Danny Trejo in the ‘Mexi-can or Mexi-can’t’ scene (yep, I’m serious).
• and the stunt double who successfully gets out of the way of the runaway car, and then runs back into its path. Absolutely amazing, in the worst possible way.

Film or Movie: Movie. Most definitely movie.

Popcorn Factor: Yes, but for all the wrong reasons.

Buy It: Nope.

Rent It: Oh, absolutely.

Flip ya…flip ya for real.
Karl.

(And you thought I was joking.)